Tag Archives: Cat

Zut alors!

Well it is official.  I’m going to miss Cat’s big 4th of July bash at the lake for the first time.  It sucks and I’m bummed about it. 

But, I’ve got to keep my job.  And since this is MY project, it’s not like I can run away for the weekend and put it off any longer.  Testing starts, worldwide, on Monday, whether I’m ready for it or not.  So I’ll spend the weekend making damn sure I’m ready.

I dug my hole.  I made my bed.  I had my cake.  However you want to say it, it’s poor time management skills on my part, mixed with a little too much faith in others.  There has just been entirely too much going on lately.  Hell, I’ve had the first 2 discs of the final season of QAF here since Tuesday and haven’t even been able to touch them.  That’s just…wrong.

I’m hopeful I’ll at least find some time to drive over to downtown Garland Saturday evening for one of the 3-part city of Garland celebrations.  Might be some good photo ops there with the little street fair going on and such.  And, of course, there’s that nighttime Plaza Theatre shot I want still.

Coming up for air

The hockey game went spectacularly this weekend!  Seeing everyone have such a great time and knowing what we’ve accomplished with this event makes it all worthwhile.  Still waiting on a few invoices, but best estimate, I’d say we raised close to what we raised last year.  I don’t think we beat it though, but that’s ok.  It’s still going to be a great donation!

As much fun as it was…I am glad to have that (mostly) behind me.

We start testing for our October upgrade next week.  And I’m still scrambling to get test cases finished and ready to go.  These next several months are going to be rough, no doubt about that. 

I’m supposed to go out to the lake this weekend for Cat’s annual 4th of July bash.  I was only planning to stay one night…can’t leave Mazzy here by herself any longer than that.  Plus I have too much work to do.  So much so that I’m not even sure if I’m going to make it to the lake or not.  I need a day off and, as much as I love all the people that will be there, I could really use some down time this weekend.  I’ll have to work part of it anyway.  Although I don’t get to see Cat very often and it’s a lot of fun, so I’ll feel guilty if I don’t go.

I also know the past 2 years I’ve been battling bronchitis around this time.  I’m beginning to think it’s from stress…..letting myself get so run down.  So considering all the stuff leading up to and after the game to be done, plus all this stuff for our upgrade at work….I’m beginning to think that staying home might be better for my health.  I can’t afford to be sick right now.

Oh yeah….at the afterparty Saturday, I discovered, completely by surprise, ANOTHER person who Dr H used to do the phone sex thing with.  I wanted to vomit.  It’s bad enough that I was “with” someone that I had no attraction to, but now…..I’m so completely revolted by these other experiences….and WHO.  Just yuck.  And that just reinforces the idea that there are plenty of others.  And all of this while he was on-again-off-again with his ex.  And was pissy with her for having an online personal.  Whatthefuckever.

He and I haven’t talked much lately.  Mostly, I think, because I haven’t been online much.  Too much going on and haven’t had a spare minute.  And I think he’s been pretty busy with his job, too.  But also because I think he’s pulled his head out of his ass and stopped trying to turn us into an item of some sort.  I’m still pissed off when I think about how he was trying to do my thinking for me and tell me what I was feeling.  For him to tell ME that the only time MY “true” feelings come out is when I’m drinking?!?!  Yet, when referring to a friend of his, he easily admits that alcohol blurs your judgment.  I wanted to point that out so badly, but I didn’t.  He sees what he wants to see I guess.

The things I say in my head vs what I say in reality are just all screwed up.  I used to have no filter, but because he’s been my friend all this time, I can’t say anything.  Because when I get irritated to that extent, whatever I say won’t be pretty.  So I bite my tongue.  And then it festers.

It’s weird actually.  i was talking to a friend this weekend and the subject came up and it got me thinking.  Honestly, if I had met him first in person originally, we would’ve never been friends.  At least not close ones.  And certainly not done anything else.  I would’ve thought, well, he seems nice, but not somebody I’d hang out with on a regular basis.

Despite what everyone always likes to insist in these situations, he is NOT the same in person as online.   Personally, and I told him this a long time ago, I don’t think ANYONE can be the same in person.  Because when you’re talking online, or even on the phone, you establish an IDEA of what the person is like.  And that IDEA is not based in reality, it’s based on your (limited) experience with that person.  A tiny window into that person’s world.  Just as I’m sure if you met me, I wouldn’t be what you expected either.  It’s no one’s fault.  It just is.

I have nothing to say.

Really, I don’t.  It’s late.  I should be asleep.   Besides, I sound like one of those mechanical voicebox things so you really don’t want me to say anything. 

I thought I was feeling better last Thursday.  So I met Mexigoalie, Nala, and Cat at Uncle Julio’s for Nala’s birthday on Friday afternoon.  Then went to the Stars game with Red (hey, I paid $50 for that ticket to sit in the lower bowl and I wasn’t about to let some silly illness make that money go to waste!).  All week I had been able to last, at most, 4 hours before curling up and sleeping for an hour or two.  The stupid decongestent my doctor gave me makes me sooo drowsy.  So by the time I got ready, drove to the restaurant, ate, and we headed to the game, I was already a good 3 hours into my semi-alert and awake time. 

Midway through the first period, my eyes were tearing up, my throat hurt, and I couldn’t pay attention to the game.  That’s right…I could not stay focused on the hockey game.  Now you know I felt like shit.

Stars vs Coyotes

Somehow, by the beginning of the 3rd period, I was feeling a little more human and was able to yell and scream and enjoy the game.  Except for the fact that I had essentially no voice.  We lost the game, which sucked.  And confirmed my superstition that I can not ever sit in a different seat again.  From now on, it’s my season ticket seat or bust. 

After the game, Red had begged and pleaded with us days in advance to meet up afterwards for post-game adult beverages.   So about 12 or so of us hit the Old No 7 for a few.  I guess the alcohol numbed my throat so I felt ok, but my voice was getting harder and harder to tolerate.

After staying longer than a sick girl should, I finally headed home around midnight.  Decided to stop at Jack in the Box for some coffee.  Now keep in mind that I had not uttered a word since I said bye to my friends and left the bar.  So it was to my complete surprise, and utter horror, that when I opened my mouth to order at the drive thru, I couldn’t get anything out louder than a whisper.   I had to pull around to the window and repeat myself (as if repeating the words in my head that I couldn’t seem to vocalize really did much good) and use various attempts at sign language to order my coffee. 

Three days later and I can talk now atleast.  But I sound like a complete freak.  Like I should be pushing some invisible button on my throat to speak.