- I have a meeting with the smoke-offended party this morning. I think I’ll take a smoke break right before it so I’ll be good and stinky. #
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Today I received my Dell Mini 10″ Netbook. It is green and adorable. I have not, as of yet, determined how usable it is. I’m using it now.
I have been trying to break the bad habit of using my work laptop for everything, but I missed being able to sit in the living room and browse the internet at the same time. If I go sit in my office, it’s too confining, and I end up spending way too much time online. With the laptop, I could check email, facebook, flickr, just quickly for updates and then go back to the movie I might be watching or the book I might be reading. But am seeing more and more how using my work laptop was keeping me tied to my job when I am supposed to be off.
So, a few weeks back I ordered this cute little netbook. It’s about the size of a small spiral notebook. The keyboard is slightly smaller than a regular keyboard, but not unbearable for my average-sized hands. it just takes some getting used to.
The screen is pretty small, making some fonts hard to read. I have 30 days to decide, so I’ll try and use it as much as possible between now and then to see if this is something I can live with. The added benefit will be that I can take this one with me if I travel and be able to download pictures, etc, without having to lug the big laptop with me.
Did I mention it was green? A pretty shiny lime green. Too freaking cute.
So, several weeks ago, I signed up on facebook to aid in my checking-up-on-the-kiddos routine. Knowing that facebook was supposed to be something like myspace, I figured I’d check there, too, to find out what new thing I should want to strangle my niece and nephews over. Only you have to be registered to search for people.
So I signed up, only to find out that my young family members don’t seem to be on there…at least not that I’ve been able to discover thus far. However, a number of my friends are and had been trying to get me on there for awhile, so in came the deluge of friend requests from them, which I accepted.
Since that time, I have spent time EVERY DAY on that blasted site. There is entirely too much to do on there. None of it worthwhile or valuable or redeemable. I can buy and sell my friends, take care of my computer-animated puppy, send plants to friends while saving the rainforests, be a mob boss, play word games and Texas Hold ‘Em, give drinks and teddy bears and water globes and hatching eggs to friends….it’s insane. And I love it.
Hi. My name is Daisy-Head and I am a facebook addict.
Tomorrow is the big day! I have to leave here at a ridiculously profanely early hour to head to the airport. I can’t believe we have to be there THREE hours early for an international flight. That’s just crazy. Hopefully I can get a good nap in on our 2.5 hour flight to Cozumel. I’m still debating whether or not I should try and get 4 hours of sleep between now and leaving for the airport. I’m seriously afraid of sleeping through my alarm.
I’m about 90% packed at this point, certain that I have more clothes than I’ll need, and yet still worrying that I’m forgetting something. I always do. I’ve got my cameras, my chargers, sunscreen, sunglasses, swimsuits, hats, sandals, books, some cash, a toothbrush and clean underwear. That’s the necessities, right?
As an added boost of excitement, I got to watch my Stars win game 2 tonight against San Jose. I was thrilled that they made it out of the first round of the playoffs for the first time in YEARS. And even more ecstatic that they managed to win not one, but BOTH of the first two games (on the road) to kick-start round 2. We won’t get to see games 3 and 4 that will be played here in Dallas…unless someone knows of a place in Cozumel that will be showing the game. 😛 But I’m feeling better about that knowing that, at least the series won’t be over before we get back…well, unless the Stars make a clean sweep of it, but I’m not holding my breath for that.
Anyway, I have no idea what kind of internet access there will be at the resort we’re staying at. I’ve seen no mention of it being in the rooms, so not even going to bother with bringing my laptop. There’s supposedly an internet kiosk, but who knows what that will cost. So, with only my blackberry to keep me semi-connected (email and mobile web only….everything else is waaaaay expensive….glad I checked that out before I leave), I won’t have any way to give updates on my trip. Well, I can send updates on twitter. That’s something. I haven’t figured out how to post email blogs here yet. But I’ll be sure to blog all about our adventures in Cozumel when I get home.
Have a great week! I know I will.
What a week. It started by the unexpected death of my home computer. I think she had a nervous breakdown and committed suicide. Last Sunday was spent shopping for a replacement, which, thanks to Red Baron, ended up being a MUCH nicer computer than I was aiming for. Then I had to borrow a drive enclosure from work, pull the hard drive out of the old computer, and begin the process of transferring everything to the new computer….while deleting the obvious crap.
Thursday, despite loads of ibuprofen and ambien, I was up most of the night with a horrific toothache. Missed a dept meeting on Friday and our HR celebration thing at Dave & Busters, but finally managed to find a dentist who could see me the same day. He did an xray, told me I needed a root canal, prescribed me some pain pills and antibiotics, and sent me on my way. They scheduled me for Monday, but a cancellation had me back in their offices Saturday morning for root canal part 1. It was not pleasant. I have to go back next Saturday for part deux.
Much of the remainder of Saturday was spent in a hydrocodone-induced coma on my couch. Watched a few movies and that’s about it. Zodiac was decent. It made me want to read the book. And Christine never gets old!
I received my newly purchased Office 2007 (from work’s home use program for dirt cheap) yesterday, so will be installing that on the new computer today. Once I get that done, I should be off to the races!
The hockey game went spectacularly this weekend! Seeing everyone have such a great time and knowing what we’ve accomplished with this event makes it all worthwhile. Still waiting on a few invoices, but best estimate, I’d say we raised close to what we raised last year. I don’t think we beat it though, but that’s ok. It’s still going to be a great donation!
As much fun as it was…I am glad to have that (mostly) behind me.
We start testing for our October upgrade next week. And I’m still scrambling to get test cases finished and ready to go. These next several months are going to be rough, no doubt about that.
I’m supposed to go out to the lake this weekend for Cat’s annual 4th of July bash. I was only planning to stay one night…can’t leave Mazzy here by herself any longer than that. Plus I have too much work to do. So much so that I’m not even sure if I’m going to make it to the lake or not. I need a day off and, as much as I love all the people that will be there, I could really use some down time this weekend. I’ll have to work part of it anyway. Although I don’t get to see Cat very often and it’s a lot of fun, so I’ll feel guilty if I don’t go.
I also know the past 2 years I’ve been battling bronchitis around this time. I’m beginning to think it’s from stress…..letting myself get so run down. So considering all the stuff leading up to and after the game to be done, plus all this stuff for our upgrade at work….I’m beginning to think that staying home might be better for my health. I can’t afford to be sick right now.
Oh yeah….at the afterparty Saturday, I discovered, completely by surprise, ANOTHER person who Dr H used to do the phone sex thing with. I wanted to vomit. It’s bad enough that I was “with” someone that I had no attraction to, but now…..I’m so completely revolted by these other experiences….and WHO. Just yuck. And that just reinforces the idea that there are plenty of others. And all of this while he was on-again-off-again with his ex. And was pissy with her for having an online personal. Whatthefuckever.
He and I haven’t talked much lately. Mostly, I think, because I haven’t been online much. Too much going on and haven’t had a spare minute. And I think he’s been pretty busy with his job, too. But also because I think he’s pulled his head out of his ass and stopped trying to turn us into an item of some sort. I’m still pissed off when I think about how he was trying to do my thinking for me and tell me what I was feeling. For him to tell ME that the only time MY “true” feelings come out is when I’m drinking?!?! Yet, when referring to a friend of his, he easily admits that alcohol blurs your judgment. I wanted to point that out so badly, but I didn’t. He sees what he wants to see I guess.
The things I say in my head vs what I say in reality are just all screwed up. I used to have no filter, but because he’s been my friend all this time, I can’t say anything. Because when I get irritated to that extent, whatever I say won’t be pretty. So I bite my tongue. And then it festers.
It’s weird actually. i was talking to a friend this weekend and the subject came up and it got me thinking. Honestly, if I had met him first in person originally, we would’ve never been friends. At least not close ones. And certainly not done anything else. I would’ve thought, well, he seems nice, but not somebody I’d hang out with on a regular basis.
Despite what everyone always likes to insist in these situations, he is NOT the same in person as online. Personally, and I told him this a long time ago, I don’t think ANYONE can be the same in person. Because when you’re talking online, or even on the phone, you establish an IDEA of what the person is like. And that IDEA is not based in reality, it’s based on your (limited) experience with that person. A tiny window into that person’s world. Just as I’m sure if you met me, I wouldn’t be what you expected either. It’s no one’s fault. It just is.
Ok, so I talked to Dr H about the Flirt situation last night. I couldn’t NOT talk to him about it any longer. It was making me bitchy and carrying over into our conversations and, if I’m going to continue being friends with the guy, that just wouldn’t do.
So pretty much as soon as I mentioned the circumstances leading up to what I wanted to talk to him about, his comment was, “Sounds like someone didn’t honor her own request.” Meaning Flirt made him promise not to tell me and then she did. I’m sneaky like that though.
I got to hear his side of the story (no, I didn’t want details, tyvm. Just the thought of her and him like that makes me vomit a little.) about how it all came about between the two of them. And that this was somewhere in the neighborhood of 2 years ago. Before he and I had become such good friends. That wasn’t what bothered me about it though. I certainly wasn’t mad at him (or her) for not telling me. As I said before, really none of my business. It was more a matter of is this is a thing with him….does he do this often with girls from the internet, etc. And what did that make me.
Based on the past few years that I’ve “known” him, and talking to him almost daily for the past year, I (mostly) know it wasn’t like that.
This happening while he was still on/off with his ex….I told him flat out that was disappointing because I never pegged him as a cheater. He’s not proud of it, but admits his loneliness got the better of him (they lived 90 miles apart and were mostly on the outs by then I guess). The fact that people (guys) DON’T think that is cheating is beyond me. I had the same argument with my brother several years ago.
But a little cybersex is not going to keep me from being his friend. At least not at this point. My trust level with him is not what it used to be…and I think he realizes that. So we’ll just have to see how it goes. He has been one of my very good friends for awhile now and I can’t imagine that changing.
So I’ve decided to make note of some of the people that are near and dear to me at this point in my life. I’ve mentioned many of them before, but have decided I will, occasionally, devote an entry to describing the relationships I have with each and what it is about them that I love so much. And maybe what annoys me, too. We’ll see how it goes.
So to kick things off is someone I have known for awhile but still don’t really know: Dr Honeydew.
I met Dr Honeydew a couple of years ago when he was in town for a Stars game. Didn’t really spend much time talking to him, as it was a big group of us, and he had to get back on the road towards home. We talked online sporadically after that. Then, in 2004, we started talking more often. I think maybe it was around the time I was buying my house and was asking for tips from people on home repairs, etc.
Anyway, fast forward to today. Dr Honeydew and I talk almost every single night online and have for just about a year now. He is the one person that I can vent to about any and everything. I can talk to him about things that I don’t talk to anyone about. Probably because he’s not here, and, as he says, we don’t have to look each other in the eye. So I can bitch about a friend pissing me off or about my pathetic social life or, yes, even my adventures in the world of “casual sex” without worry of him repeating it to someone else and creating potentially awkward situations.
He doesn’t judge me, or if he does, I can’t tell. He’s supportive. He’s incredibly smart and he’s a smartass (2 HUGE bonus points in my book!). And he keeps me honest. When I try to talk myself into or out of things, he always manages to ask the right questions that make me see the bigger picture. And then, whatever decision I end up making, whether he agrees or not, he supports that it is my choice. And when I’m in one of my meloncholy moods, he can always make me smile. Or even better, laugh.
When we met in person (the one and only time) was not long after Dr Honeydew was supposed to be married. Although they called it off, they stayed together for awhile longer. When he finished his doctorate, he moved to another state for work and expected that she would be following shortly thereafter. Well, that didn’t happen either. So now we both bitch and moan about our sad (lack of) love lives. At least he’s making an effort to get out there and meet people. I don’t have that courage yet. Well, it comes and goes.
Over the past year, I feel we have gotten to know each other pretty well. Atleast, as well as you can over the internet and the occasional phone call. And I consider him to be one of my very dearest friends.
He’s been hoping to come to Dallas again soon to visit and catch a few more games. If he does come, I’ve offered to let him stay at my house. In the guest room, of course. Within the past few months, it’s come down to him actually having specific dates in mind. Because of monetary issues, it’s been up in the air as to whether or not it will actually happen…and it’s starting to look more and more like it won’t. Atleast not any time soon. Yet, just the thought that it could has forced me to acknowledge certain thoughts and feelings that I have about him.
I realize, having been down that road before, that it’s easy to think you know someone pretty well and might even like them based on conversations alone. You have to keep in mind that all the feelings you might have for this person are based on the illusion of who you think they are…the picture you’ve painted of them in your mind. In the real world, however, we all know there is a certain physical aspect to attraction as well. Based on pictures I’ve seen (I only vaguely remember what he looks like from when I met him), he’s not the typical “type” that I generally go for. Then again, given my track record with “my type,” that may be a good thing. Plus, I was 30-ish pounds lighter when we met, too.
It’s not that, really, that troubles me. Well, it does a little because I don’t know what to expect if and when he does come to visit. I mean, we’re friends and we care a lot about each other. I know that. I just don’t know if either of us is expecting/hoping/thinking that there may be something more there. And even if there is….hello? He lives in another state!!
What I’m most concerned about is that, what if he visits and it’s awkward? Or what if we just can’t stand each other?? Because, frankly, the idea of losing our friendship frightens me. I love him to pieces and couldn’t stand it if I lost him as a friend.
The internet, that is. My service has been off and on (mostly off) since yesterday afternoon. And the customer service for Comcast is a complete joke. If I had the option, I would so get rid of them and go back to dsl.
Anyway, just popping in for a minute while I have the ability to do so. I’m scared to enter too much in case my connection craps out again.
I did see T last night though. More on that later.
Added at 6pm:
It’s 3 hours and later and I’m still up and running. Dare I be so brave as to try hooking my router back up now? Being tethered to a land line is such an inconvenience.
I’m about to pop in a dvd and vegetate on the couch for a few hours. If that doesn’t keep me occupied, I’ll probably interrupt someone’s evening with my bored IM ramblings. Oh, who am I kidding? I’ll do that either way.
The internet truly is a fascinating place, I have to admit. Aside from being an excellent time-waster, a quick reference center, and a shopaholic’s dream (or nightmare perhaps), it has proven to be a fairly successful place to make some new friends.
As I look back over the last year or so of my life, it occurs to me that the majority of people I like to call friends these days are those I have met through common interests online. And I’m not talking pen-pal, let’s IM, reading each other’s blogs type of friends. But real people that I go to lunch with, have drinks with, see concerts with, and generally enjoy knowing. I wonder where I would be right now had these various people not become a part of my life. To these people I say, “I treasure your friendship!” 😉
Although the online dating scene, that I ventured into in years past, was disastrous. I think there has got to be a point, very early on, where you meet in person and get it over with. Otherwise you do this back-and-forth emailing, maybe some instant messaging, perhaps even phone calls. All adding to the illusion that you know, and possibly even like, this person. Then, when you finally do meet, if you don’t hit it off in the “real world”, you’re faced with the awkward dilemma of explaining yourself.
No, I’m not shallow. I don’t base my like/dislikes of the opposite sex solely on physical appearance. But, I hate to break it to you, anyone who says it doesn’t matter is bullshitting you. There has to be some sort of attraction. It could be as simple as a great smile or the way they carry themself, but there has to be something. And when it’s not there, you’ve spent all this time building a psuedo-relationship with someone who you, ultimately, have no interest in dating. While you may enjoy their company and genuinely want to continue a friendship with them, we all know that response is rarely welcome.
I think the lesson learned here is that the best route is the direct route. Why waste each other’s time tiptoeing around the subject. You either like each other or you don’t. You can’t force something that isn’t there. I tried. And I failed miserably because, rather than admit (to both the guy and myself) that I wasn’t into him in that way and risk hurting his feelings, I continued to go out with him. Partly because I was determined to stop dating the same type of guy that I always seem to find myself with. But also because he was a lot of fun and a really incredible person. There was just no real spark. I’m not proud of the way I handled it and have vowed to do better in the future.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been on the other end of that situation, too. It just seems guys are better skilled at the quick exit.
Oops. Didn’t mean to go off on a tangent there. Funny how the mind works. Now how about that movie?