It has been 61 long hours since I have smoked or had nicotine of any kind. I find myself alternating between emotionally charged self-pity and wanting to cut people. Any one. For any reason.
It’s a good thing I cleared out all my ashtrays and emptied the trash…According to the smoking cessation apps I’m following, my sense of smell and taste have improved. So all I can think of is how much better a cigarette would smell and taste now!!
I haven’t left the house in 2.5 days because I still don’t trust myself to not go to RaceTrac and buy a new pack…or carton. Maybe later I will go for a drive. Thankfully, I never started smoking in my baby, so that shouldn’t be a trigger.
Everyone says this will get easier. When, exactly? I still don’t know whether it’s nicotine cravings or missing the ACT of smoking that makes this difficult. But either way, it can’t happen anymore.
I hate everyone.